“Look closer, see me”

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What do you see friend ?
What do you see ?
What are you thinking when you’re looking at me ?
A lost young woman,
not very wise ?
Uncertain of everything,
with faraway eyes ?
Who hides her smile and makes no reply.
When you say in a loud voice,
“I do wish you’d try.”
Who seemes not to notice the things that you do,
and never helps others, even though they need you to.
Who, resisting or not,
lets you do as you will.
With walking or talking,
the long day to fill.
Is that what you’re thinking ?
Is that what you see ?
Then open your eyes, friend, you’re not looking at me.

I’ll tell you who I am as I sit here so still.
As I do when you’re near me,
while the whole room you fill.
I’m a twin child of two,
with a daddy and a mother.
My parents are divorced because they did’nt love each other.
I now have a new daddy and i got two step-brother.
My family is increased, but I wish I was another.

A Young girl of thirteen,
with wings on her feet.
Dreaming that soon now,
a lover she’ll meet.
A girl with a lot of friends,
a girl with a lot of fun.
But the one thing she don’t have,
is the true only one.

I found my first guy, my boyfriend, my man.
But after some years, he disappeared into the sand.
I now was a victim of jealousy, lies and hate.
But how could I leave it when I thought it was my fate.
It’s hard to be clever,
to leave your first love.
But I had to trust the ones that told me,
that I deserved self-love.

At eightteen years old,
I’m now all alone.
I need one to guide me,
and a secure happy home.
I think og the moments,
and my heart gives a leap.
Remembering the five hard years that have passed,
with the guy I loved deep.

I may be a lonely girl in a life that seems so cruel.
It’s jest when you have blond hair you look like a fool.
And though I know that I’m in, my greatest years part,
there now is a stone where I once had a heart.
I have felt a lot of pain,
but still survived it all.
You can do what you want to,
if you don’t act like a doll.

I now have a new boyfriend, my superman in life.
He’s the right one for me,
maybe one day I’m his wife.
But though light days are upon me, dark days are ahead,
cause suddenly I’m in sadness and a depression I get.
Three years of fighting,
three years in hell.
Three terrible years were I only felt I fell.

After these years I decided to start a study,
and quickly I understand what was going on with my body.
We learned about depression,
we learned about aggression.
And suddenly I felt like I have an answer to my question.
We learned about sadness,
we learned about physiological things,
and again I felt that I got feets with their own pair of wings.

Finally it seemed like,
I was going in the right direction.
But in the middel of it all,
my relationship were now an complication.
My boyfriend decided to leave,
and therefore left me all alone.
So once again my heart,
were replaced by a stone.

Five years has passed,
with the guy I wanted to keep.
Five amazing years,
with blood, tears and sweat.
And though love not always has a beautiful face,
it’s also a love I don’t wan’t to replace.
Cause this love has shaped me as the human I am today,
and for that I’m thankful and I won’t give that away.

So when I think about the last relationships of my life,
it’s like I’ve seen the biggest love from both of the side.
The first real love and the love of my life.
I’m pleased that I has experienced the two love inside.
And inside this sad body a glad girl still dwells,
and now and again my battered heart sweels.
I remember the joy and I remember the pain.
And I try loving and living life over again.

The difficult days are upon me,
and the innocent years is now gone.
I look at the future,
and know now that I did’nt won.
Cause my friends are all having,
boyfriends of their own.
And I think of the years,
and all the love that I’ve known.

I think of all the things,
it all happend too fast.
But I now can accept the stark fact,
that nothing can last.
Everybody gets born,
everybody will die.
But the space right in the middle,
is yours to reply.
Now open your eyes, friend, open and see.
Not a sad and twisted young woman,
Look closer see me.

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